All Is Fair in Loch and Moor

(or Sweaty Shorts, Dead Tired: my account of SSDT `02) by Guy Smeeth

Hello fellow trials enthusiast! I recently returned from participating in a famous motorcycle trials event called the Scottish Six Days Trial _ perhaps you've heard of it? It has been held for over 90 years in the Scottish Highlands, centred in Fort William, about 100 miles north of Glasgow. It has developed a reputation for being a devil of an event, taking place over six days and nearly 900 kilometres. The distances and much of the terrain are thought to be quite gruelling, but the biggest challenge perhaps, is dealing with the weather…or so they say!

Well, let me tell you: I have competed in (and finished) the event in both 2000 and 2002. (There was no event held in 2001 due to an outbreak of foot in mouth disease in the UK. Now I'm no expert, but I've put my foot in my mouth on many occasions and it has never prevented me from riding my motorcycle marginally! But I digress.) Because I have competed in the event effectively twice in a row now, I do consider myself to be somewhat of an authority on the event. So let me tell you: if someone tries to tell you that the event is a $#?!;% and that the weather is horrid in the Highlands, politely excuse yourself and walk away with haste.

As a self-appointed authority having experienced it not once, but twice…yes that's right, TWO times, I can tell you that this little banana belt they call Lochaber has shown me some of the nicest weather this side of the tropics. Sure it sprinkled for about 1½ days out of the six; it also routinely pours rain in Hawaii and Mexico.

After being tricked into investing precious dollars in rain gear and wicking underclothes for the 2000 event (and then like a fool, burdening myself with the same for my travels this year), I sadly regret not having documented details on who gave me this bad advice. If I had, I would most certainly be proceeding with legal action to recover from these deceitful and guilty parties costs incurred from the purchase of my unnecessary "foul weather" apparel.

Well, enough bitterness; let me get down to my not so tall tale!

My Back, The Breaker, and The Foamy-Seat Maker

It all began on Thursday, the 2^nd of May when my sweetheart Dalit and I boarded an Air Canada 747 for the 9-hour flight from Vancouver to Heathrow. About two weeks before departure my old lower back injury had flared up. I was able to manage it somewhat but it sure had me worried, the main problem being that sitting down was very painful. Unlike the early aeroplane designs of Icarus & Daedalus and on to Wilbur & Orville Wright, the planes of today are generally the sit-down kind. So, needless to say, I was walking (if you can call it that) about as ably as a 98 year-old geezer by the time we got off the plane in London.

A short wait, then up to Glasgow. We spent the night in a nice B&B, went to Charles Rennie Mackintosh's Glasgow School of Art and then caught a 3-hour bus up to Fort William. The weather was beautiful, the paddock was bustling when we arrived and the Gas Gas team welcomed me with my brand new 280 TXT 02 (arranged for me by Don Clark of Mountain Motorcycles in Vancouver)!

The following day (Sunday) was spent signing on, preparing my machine (just a general going-over: waterproofing, wheel balancing, etc.), making a thin foam seat, familiarising myself briefly with "Road Trials", then parading through Fort William. A couple of cheers of recognition from Canadian supporters and the bike was impounded and put to bed until Monday at 9:25 AM when rider #115 would be "unleashed" to begin his wobbly "attack" on the 2002 SSDT.

241 miles Just to Kiss a Stone?

Monday morning arrived after a relatively sound night of sleep (a far contrast from 2000 when the effects of jet lag and the kid on Christmas Eve anticipation factor kept me up most of the first three or four nights of the trial). I found the day to be fairly tough: 70 miles, about 30 of which was off-road and often in moors. Sections were mixed:

some very tough for me, but all sharing one thing _ rocks of all shapes and sizes. Stones, boulders or slabs, whatever your fancy, you'll get your fill at the SSDT. I was fairly pleased with my ten cleans of Day 1, but many 5s brought my score to 78. Still, I was relatively pleased with my performance. How could I complain? Weather was perfect, bike ran like a thoroughbred and I finished with time to spare.

Day 2 (Tuesday) was fairly long with 30 more sections and 106 miles, much of which was road. There were about three separate sections of moor or forestry track to break things up and keep you on your toes. Score was about the same as Monday, but only 6 cleans and then 23 time penalty points when I and about half the entrants were caught up in some unaccounted-for road construction. Quite frustrating but a good day nonetheless - my least favourite moment when I chose to balk at the infamous step at Witches Burn as I found myself slightly off-line and unsure. Had I not been riding a borrowed bike in such a special or important event I might have rolled the dice and twisted the old right grip…

Wednesday saw good weather once again with 65 miles (half of which was off-road and typically quite punishing). Significant happenings of that day included an inadvertent attempt to split a Scottish boulder _ with my smiling face! To expand: after being humbled at the group of sections at Blackwater I was on a bit of a roll on the next four sections. 2 cleans, a 1, and then on a clean with about 5 feet to go of the fourth and final section, already grinning smugly (prematurely), my front wheel deflected so suddenly to the side that I found myself thrown, face-first, into a large boulder. So abruptly did my ride come undone that I was unable to get my hands up in time to break my fall. My face took the brunt of the hit and I lay there somewhat dazed, but mostly horrified that I had certainly knocked out my chompers. Slowly I got up to find, to my relief, that I was only scraped and split but otherwise fine. With my face bloodied but looking worse than it actually was I continued on with okay results.

Later on in a bit of a panic, thinking I was late, I arrived at the final four sections of Trotters Burn with a face only a meat-cutter or a mother could love. I ran through for a quick look then mounted my bike to try my hand. I got a clean, a 1, and then (in a big moment for me) managed to get up the nasty final step! I was thrilled _ riding giddily all the way back to Fort William to check in on time.

Near Meltdown and Looking for Gorton

Well, the event was now half over, my back was holding up, the bike was working well and with threatening skies Thursday began. Day 4 is arguably the toughest because of its extreme 116 miles total. A large portion of the day is spent riding across the seemingly endless moors and off-road areas. It was in this vast expanse of mountains and bogs that I encountered my first and only real bike problem: cooling trouble. The fan blade was catching on the radiator frame and therefore causing a boil over. I ended up stopping twice before I was able to diagnose and fix it. Though this was a big stress, killing about 30 minutes in total, I did manage to get in on time with never another cooling issue.

Let me break from my journal for a moment here to help dispel the old myth that "good guys finish last". Amongst others who stopped to offer me help was none other than Amos Bilbao, who, as you're probably aware, won the event overall. That's the spirit of a champion; after his kind deed he certainly had my blessing riding along with him.

I got to see something else special on Thursday: the four sections at Gorton _ and I actually rode them fairly well. In the 2000 event I inadvertently missed these sections and was accordingly penalised a whopping 200 points; needless to say I was careful not to make the same mistake this year.

Friday was a poor day for me, though it offered mostly road for the loop (110 miles). I wasn't pleased with my riding in the sections. Pipers Burn was especially cruel to me and the weather was not great, pretty much sprinkling rain (it could have been far worse) throughout the day. I finished with only 2 cleans, many fives and my highest total for the event. With five of the six days now complete I realised I had only one more chance to put in the kind of performance I knew I was capable of. After a good night's sleep so would begin my final day of SSDT 02.

The Gifts of the Imaginary Magi and Almost a Bull's Taco

Saturday arrived with sunshine and blue skies on the Scottish Riviera, but looming in the west were skies as black as any I've seen in Raincouver, my distant home. I set out eagerly, armed with a day-old tire and a commitment to avoid fives and end up with a score in the sixties. The route was only 65 miles, but consisted almost entirely of off-road, some of it quite torturous. Swampy bogs, hundreds of ditches for the leaping and millions of ever-lurking sharp stones doing their best to flatten your tires or beat your wrists and hands into submission…

I'm thrilled to say that the day was a huge success for me: I rode to my potential, earned 11 cleans and only 2 fives and ended up with a total of 51 points, well "below" my goal. I was delighted: I had a lot of fun, pretty much riding a high all day long and at the end of the day my score matched that of John Isherwood, a rider who I respect highly. "51" is a great personal achievement for me, though somewhat double-edged. You see, earning a first-class award has been somewhat of a dream to me, and, since this 51-point Saturday, has now become a realistic goal. The cut-off for 1^st class is about 350 points meaning that in order to place within it one needs to average 58 points per day. So, my personal success now has both encouraged and cursed me with needing to go back and try again at least one more time!

Despite how positively the event finished for me, it was not without its drama. At the event's final two sections at Ben Nevis (excluding the "gimme" at Town Hall Brae) I saw my world almost come tumbling down. In these difficult sections I ended up earning my second 5 of the day and experienced the panic of feeling an imminent DNF this close to the finish line. In the first of the two sub-sections I broke my drive chain, then it tangled catastrophically in the swing arm pivot, etc. As I managed to pull my bike out of the section my anxiety level reached the red zone: Dalit now had my tools and was hidden amidst the hundreds of spectators. She didn't see me and I couldn't see her and time was ticking quickly away.

And so there soon appeared a guardian angel in the form of rider number 94, Hans Teuscher of Switzerland. Hans was competing in his first SSDT, and often throughout the week I had seen him struggling but always soldiering on, determined to finish. The spirit of the Scottish Six Days is exemplified by people like Hans. Whether you're Steve Colley or Amos Bilbao trying to win the event, or Guy Smeeth wanting to finish in the top half or Hans Teuscher wanting just to actually finish, we all have worthy and personally significant goals. Well Hans, who was due in before me, took the time to assist me. He gave me a master link, lent me some tools and together we got my bike operational, allowing me to carry on. And he…apparently to vanish into thin air?

You see, I never again saw Hans. He doesn't appear in the results and I can't even find him on the web site as a finisher. I'm terribly concerned that by helping me, he was late or something and failed to finish the event - so close to the end. If any reader, Hans included, could update me, I would greatly appreciate it. And if you do read this Hans, thank you so much. As you said, "Next time it might be me that needs help." And the universe will likely be there for you when you need it.

Anyway, with my little Saturday afternoon mini-drama nearly complete, with fingers crossed I cautiously made my way through the final Ben Nevis section with a three. Then began the circuitous return to Fort William with some anxiety; suddenly I found myself having to run a rather frightening gauntlet of the bovine kind. Just after leaving Ben Nevis the route took riders through an idyllic looking lush green grove of trees, perhaps an apple orchard. Well, by the time I got there it was infested with some very large and very imposing Highland Cattle _ you know, those big shaggy fellas with pointy horns 3 to 4 feet across. They were everywhere and I had to ride right through the middle of them _ sometimes only 5 or 6 feet away from me. I cautiously wove my way through the herd holding my breath, remembering the blazing cape-red Gas Gas beneath me until with extreme relief I emerged on the far side unscathed!

With about 20 minutes of riding back to town I began to feel the pangs of relief and the flood of elation that signalled the coming completion of my 2^nd SSDT. A successful ride up to the final section in the Town Hall and a

quick drop down the hill to the finish podium for a little interview and I was ready to wash my machine before handing it back to the kind Spanish Gas Gas folks.

Shall I Twist Your Arm?

I have many wonderful memories of my participation in the SSDT. I encourage anyone who has an interest to give it a try. As Amos Bilbao and many others have felt and said, outside of the world championships it is the most important trial in the world. It's an incredible opportunity to meet people from all over the globe who share in your love of trials, and will be an experience you will remember and be proud of your whole life.

In closing I would like to thank my Lady, Dalit Holzman, for running up and down steep slopes even at seven months pregnant in order to cheer me on, the whole Gas Gas team of Spain for their hospitality and motocicleta magnífica, Al The Spanner of White Brothers in Darlington, UK for his ingenious mechanical know-how, my home club, the Canada Pacific Trials Association, for their support and the encouragement of many of its members, Don Clark, and my friend Jordi Rebarter of Girona, Spain. And a big hello to, amongst others, Vojta Klecka of Sweden, Iker and Patxi of Spain, and Nathan, Chris and Paul of the UK.

See you on the stones!

Guy Smeeth

Vancouver, BC, Canada

guysmeeth@shaw.ca